Confession

It's time for me to come clean. I had a bit of a relapse with depression. Nothing big. We had been pretty busy in the evenings lately. Pulling out all the boxes of kid clothes we have, going through every one's drawer, then resorting everything for what fits. I have gone through all my baby girl clothes from size 0 to 1 year. Now everything is sorted for every three months and put together. It has led to more than a few late nights and I have gone to bed anxious for sleep. Thanksgiving came and went. We spent most of the weekend at my parents house in Draper. Then just busy preparation for Christmas. I have forgotten to take my medicine. Taking my medicine had just become part of the routine. I didn't really think about it much. I was feeling sluggish, but didn't think anything of it. Then one day every time I would catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror I would have some kind of negative internal voice. "You are getting so fat" "Even with make-up you look tired" "Your skin is looking worse than ever" "How much more stretching can your body handle?" "Sick!" on and on... til that night I was wondering why I was feeling that way. After all I had called my doctor and talked to him about how I was feeling a while ago. Wasn't that why I got a prescription? Wait a minute you mean the medicine sitting next to my sink doesn't help me unless I take it every night like it says on the side of the bottle? OH! I guess I will pay more attention to that from now on. I am doing better and now when I catch a glimpse of myself all I think is how ready I am to have this baby!